I never realised this until part way through our long weekend over here in New Zealand…

When I made my vision to be fulfilling and supporting other people’s visions I didn’t realise that I could still be thwarted from ‘winning’ if those people didn’t want to receive my support to fulfil their visions…

I never thought that anyone would refuse this but there are some people who are too proud to receive this support – when they see that you’re existing for this and that they don’t have anything to offer you – that the scales are ‘unbalanced’ so to speak – they shy away – they run away – they can’t handle that and decide to ‘go it alone’…

I saw this over the weekend…

Some people don’t like it when you know more than they do or when you are more surrendered than they are – they just can’t handle it…

And they choose to go it alone – to make it happen all by themselves – they don’t want your help and yet they blame you – they twist it and blame you making up some excuse to keep you out of their lives…

What do you do when you’ve committed yourself to find your fulfilment in coming underneath and supporting and enabling other people’s visions and then they shut you out – they want to ‘do it alone’?

I guess it’s linked to their sense of worth…

Rejection is in there somewhere…

A feeling of having to be worthy to receive your support…

Something like that…

Anyway, what do you do?

I was seeking the Lord this morning – it’s been a painful few days for me – and He showed me that I go to whoever will receive my support – anyone who is willing…

I guess the ones who are under the Blood are quite happy to receive help from anyone cos they’re not precious how their vision is fulfilled or by who as long as it gets done and they know they need help and don’t care who helps them – their self esteem is ‘all good’ as they know that they are a new creation and everything good in them is of God and created by God and where there is lack they’re happy for others to ‘come in’ and add support to ‘get the job done’…

I guess it’s the difference between pride and humility…

But where does that leave me?

Sharing the gospel – sharing the grace of God – with whoever will listen…

I knew this – to just focus on those who God gave me who would receive but the Lord specifically told me to focus on these two particular people who He’d placed on my heart and I poured my heart out to them – I offered them both everything which He’d placed on my heart to and my time and my focus…

And neither of them have accepted this…

I am released – God is a Gentleman – He doesn’t force Himself where He’s not wanted…

I am released – I am released to focus out to the whole world to share the message of salvation with ‘whosoever will may come’…

There will be other times where He calls me to ‘invest’ and the ‘investment’ is not received…

He told me that this morning…

This is OK…

It’s not for me to decide when (or if) I will be received – I am to give what He gives me to give…

I am to go to everyone He sends me too and say whatever He commands me…

There’s another one who’s done this to me recently also – just coming back to mind…

I feel their pain – the first two I mentioned – but I cannot ‘touch’ them or ‘rescue’ them (I haven’t been able to touch or rescue the third one I mentioned either)…

They’ve ‘shut me out’ (or are just ignoring me not knowing what to do) and this is their choice – I must respect that…

Love You Lord…

Worship You…

Thank You for Your Support and Your Wisdom in my life…

Love You,

Andrew

(Ps. I saw this morning that truly letting go is to give these ones who’ve resisted us exactly what they’re asking for – not in a ‘bitter and twisted’ way but in reality to let them go as they have decided they require – this is real then and releases them to do what they have to do in God – even if that is to experience the pain of their rejection)

(Pss. I’ve noticed that people really struggle with waiting on God especially when He takes time in delivering them – they find it scarey to trust Him as ‘sin within them’ continues to operate and He doesn’t seem to ‘jump’ at their ‘command’ for Him to remove it – they choose ‘active-ism’ / ‘try-hard-ism’ instead of just waiting and accepting His timing in everything – I guess this is also the hardest thing which He’s been teaching me also – I guess I need to be more patient as He’s been with me, sorry Lord, Love You, Andrew)

(Psss. I forgive these three people for ‘shutting me out’, I love them Lord and I want them to grow in You, please forgive me for any bad attitudes which I’ve had towards these three and please forgive them for any ‘go it alone’ attitudes which these three have had towards You or me or both, Love You Lord, let us all – Your children – work together for the extension of Your Kingdom, Love You Lord, take me through this – take me through this pain – Love You Lord, Andrew)